@INDlAN_: Cops call their dogs K-9 because if they call K-10,
then it’s a cat.
@MichaelTrying: The best part of being incompetent to cook and feed myself is that when I travel I am positive I didn’t leave the oven on.
@david8hughes: Her: I like your hair. Did you get it cut?
Me: I washed it
Her: but it looks really different
Me: yeah I used water this time
@TheBeerGuy73: Every few weeks I login to Facebook, update my birthday to the current day, and those idiots wish me happy birthday every time.
@WhaJoTalkinBout: Turns out, if I dress like a French maid, my husband doesn't make me clean.
@RobertManchild: My car is 13 years old.
I like how the ceiling fabric hangs down and makes it feel like a blanket fort.