@Izianikapani: Cosmetology school was a real letdown. Anyone wanna buy a spacesuit?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@laurenlapkus: I'm not kidding Santa is waiting outside my house til it's "late enough" to go down my chimney
@Parentpains: If you didn't want me to wash my car on your lawn than you never should have turned your sprinkler on.
@0point5twins: Girlfriend left a note on the fridge "this isn't working, you take everything too literally". She'll be so happy when she sees the new one.