@Underchilde: Counting to ten after someone pisses you off gives you time to think of somewhere to bury them.
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@Stabby_smurf: If I have written a tweet similar to yours, I apologize for your lack of depth and vision.
@TheMichaelRock: [at interview] Her: In three words or less, tell me why we should hire you. Me: I'm good with numbers.
@xLiserx: The Wizard of Oz: A teenage runaway gets caught in a storm, commits manslaughter, & crosses state lines to see a man more than 3x her age.
@Moemontes: To the dude i just saw driving a beat up Ford mini van with spare tire and dream catcher on mirror: that dream catchers not working dude!