@koalaslament: Coworker said 'nice pink shirt, when did you come out?' I said 'IT'S NOT PINK IT'S SALMON!'. Then I snapped my fingers and skipped away.
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@hexprax: hi senator, yeah it's me again , how u been the last couple days? just want to go on record that I don't want to be killed this way either
@Marcmywords2: Dear XBOX Kinect If I wanted to use my whole body to play sports, I'd play sports.
@ShortSleeveSuit: Basic white girl [laughing]: Yasssss omg I'm dying! Takes Everything Literally Todd [shocks her with a defibrillator]: NOT ON MY WATCH!