@bea_ker: Crabs only walk that way when people are looking at them
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@MasterOfFury: i like dropping off a tweet to FB & watch as everyone cautiously forms a circle around it, looking confused while prodding it with a stick.
@JermHimselfish: As you get older, dirty talk turns into "Yeah baby, take that nap. Take all of it honey. You like that couch? Oh yeah, sleep on it..."
@AdamBroud: Friend: Well, the more you know- Me: The sadder you'll feel Friend: Me: Is that not the phrase? Friend: It's annoying that you keep getting it wrong Me: *crying* Well the more you know
@LostFelicia: Hey y'all, I finally got a smart phone. I'm a big girl now! Anyone got a 5 year old I can borrow to teach me how to use the damn thing?