@TheTweetOfGod: "Creation science" has the same intellectual heft as "dragon anatomy".
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@TheRolo: Table for six please? "Is your party coming soon or?" [Takes 4 turtles and a rat out from coat] I'm going to need booster seats
@JoshVeyssi: McDonalds should have a 3rd window where you can trade in the wrong stuff that they gave you at the 2nd window.
@LuvPug: A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn't know by now where babies come from it's not my place to tell her
@iTomFoolery: How soon is it going to be before school spelling tests only requires getting the first three letters correct until google does the rest.