@ch000ch: *crumples a hamburger next to the phone* sorry, i'm having trouble hearing u over this delicious hamburger noise call u later ok
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@gobmentcheese: I've worked at my job for 7 years & my boss still hasn't noticed that I only give Magic 8-Ball responses to all of his questions.
@toomanytoes: Judge: You need supervision. Me: [Imagines toasting toast at a slightly increased rate with laser eyes] YES! Do it now robed wizard.
@Surhailo: Ain't no sunshine when she's gone, but there sure are a lot of unauthorized charges on the credit card.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If I knew you in high school and your Facebook profile picture is a baby I'll assume you're Benjamin Button and unfriend you.