@DaddyJew: "Daddy, how are babies made?"
"Well son, when a man and a woman have too much to drink.."
@LostBrainwaves: Alligators gonna alligate
@Man_Ona_Ledge: How's adulting going for me today u ask?
Well,I just spend 20 minutes looking for my phone in my car
While using my phone as a flashlight.
@thedayofthedot: okay, i admit it. you're wrong.
@stanleybehrman: Texting is a brilliant way to miscommunicate how you feel, and misinterpret what other people mean.
@aldenskii: *in an interview*
Me: Tell me a time when you really struggled in your previous job.
Applicant: 5-7PM po.