@Elizasoul80: Damn boy, are you a wool sweater because you're irritating the shit out of me.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@litfirebird: Hiring manager: what would you say are your greatest weaknesses? Me: probably men with hairy knuckles. Oh, and a moist pot roast.
@murrman5: *comes home from poker night earlier than usual looks at wife while picking up the dog and leaves without saying anything*
@TheAlexNevil: Survival Tip: if a bear comes at you, do not try to "sweep the leg". They've all seen The Karate Kid and learned how to defend against it.
@MartaEffing: I hate when I take a nap on a park bench and everyone assumes I homeless. People with houses get tired, too.