@Thee1_4U: Damn girl, are you a jar of pickles? Because I think I NEED to bang you on my kitchen counter.
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@karenphotog: My boss said "dress for the job you want, not for the job you have" Now I am sitting in a disciplinary meeting in my Wonder Woman costume.
@thatstings: Since twitter, I don't go from home to car to work to car to home I go from charger to charger to charger to charger to charger
@VerifiedDrunk: I set my alarm clock 15 minutes fast because I enjoy doing math problems first thing in the morning,
@curlymalloy: An Apple a day may keep the Doctor away!!!... But an Onion a day keeps Everybody away!!!