@gabemakesmusic: damn girl are you a mouse because your body is decomposing in my drywall
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@Rollinintheseat: I wonder why nobody told Forrest Gump's mom that all you have to do is flip over the box of chocolates and it tells you what's inside.
@LostCatDog: The 9-year-old in me thinks life is all about fun. But then I think, how long is it gonna take to digest this kid? I'm a huge python, btw.
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: What did you learn in kindergarten today? 5-year-old: A doughnut would help me remember. Apparently she learned bribery.
@Rayne__Man: Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me three times, show me how you do that