@AnOrangeSNES: "Damn girl are you?" -Existentialist pick-up line
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@charliedelta7: One day, someone will call me sir without adding "I think we're going to have to ask you to leave."
@Merman_Melville: Moby-Dick is cool if you like stopping in the middle of a story about murdering a smart whale to think about all the different kinds of rope
@hippieswordfish: joe: siri address me as poopyhead siri: okay poopyhead *obama enters* barack: joe have you seen my phone? joe: yep here *runs away giggling*