@ElleOhHell: Damn, Starbucks. Not only do you spell my name completely wrong AND screw up my order, but on my way out some woman keeps calling me a thief
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@kibblesmith: Nice try "Marco Rubio" — or should I say... [rearranges letters] "BIRAC UBOMA" [audience gasps]
@sanbay: Vanilla body wash.... smells amazing.... tastes like shit. Someone needs to figure that out.
@midnightwhale: "OPEN THE DOOR IT'S THE POLICE" who is it? "POLICE" what is a police *cops start whispering* "how does he not know what a police is"