@peteholmes: "dance like no one is watching, walk like someone is behind you trying to get around you." - ancient nyc proverb
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@NewDadNotes: Justice League HQ Batman: -so they pay me 1 mil a yr Superman: 1.5 for me Aquaman: I'm paid in sand dollars Wonder Woman: you guys get paid?
@Terdoh: Eat, Pray, Love was such a boring movie, I watched it on a plane and people still walked out.
@Yankeegiant72: The bad news: I shaved off my beard. The good news: none of my co-workers recognize me and have stopped talking to me.
@sonictyrant: Me: i need some decoration for this cake Store clerk: Icing? Me: Yeah and I can beatbox, can we just focus on the cake?