@MadamBetteNoire: Dance like you aren't depressed. Sing like you didn't kill that homeless guy. Love like you don't have herpes.
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@richardosman: My daughter is in China and sends me photos of mis-translations. This is my new favourite.
@GoldenSpirals: Laughed hysterically and said "Oh yes, please do" after the pizza shop guy asked if he could put the sauce in my box. I think I scared him.
@kwirkyKerri: *at movie theater* M: I'll take a large popcorn with extra butter. H: Sure. What movie are you seeing? M: I'm not.