@scrirc: Danger is my middle name. nnFirst name: AvoidsnLast name: Completely
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@STitusR: Taking my dog out in below zero weather brings one thought to mind. I should have gotten a cat.
@thenatewolf: I saw an old couple sharing a newspaper and was like "oh wow maybe marriage is cool" and then the lady said "STOP BREATHING ON ME"
@shutupmikeginn: My funeral instructions to my family were to have me cremated, and I told my best friends under no circumstances should I be cremated.
@iLikeCatShirts: Oprah says we all have a small child inside of us longing to get out & omg why isn't anyone talking about Oprah eating children?