We're redesigning Funny Tweeter. Your feedback is always welcome. Talk to us at @funTweeters
@PlopWaffle: Date : So you're the youngest of three?
Me : Yep, my parents are both older.
@jasonroeder: I don't think my neighbor knows my rule about not interacting unless we're both pointing at the same tornado.
@brennadine: OUCH I HAVE A FOOT CRAMP
[Walks on toes]
Drink some water
[Crawls on knees]
[Lays on floor]
@mrs_campfire: Me: intuitive eating is easy. It’s all about listening to your body
My body: I’m begging you...eat a vegetable....please
Me: what’s that? More cheese?
@_ElvishPresley_: Ground Control: the papers want to know whose shirts you wear!
Major Tom: tell my wife I love her very—
Ground Control: WHAT SHIRTS TOM
@murrman5: [spending entire date hiding the fact I'm really a beaver]
"I got a splinter"
may I see?
"I guess so"