@jwoodham: Dating is a win-win. If things go well, you eat food and fall in love. If they don't, you still eat food and that's all that really matters.
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@Fred_Delicious: *sits down in a classy as hell bar* "barkeep! a bottle of your finest champagne please. I earn..." *lowers shades* "$200 every 4 months"
@rablivingstone: People in the UK eat more bananas than monkeys. In 2014 they ate 73,432,384 bananas and only 6 monkeys.
@ItsMrWoody2U: Me: bless me father for I have sinned. Priest: how long since your last confession my son? Me: about 45 minutes ago...
@JermHimselfish: As you get older, dirty talk turns into "Yeah baby, take that nap. Take all of it honey. You like that couch? Oh yeah, sleep on it..."