@AmberTozer: Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them
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@Floatersfinest: People laugh cos I've got 3 cats, but come the next Ice Age, when I speed past you on my cat sled, who'll be laughing then?
@LilMamacitaDont: I tweeted about Darth Vader wearing Depends earlier. Since then, two Vaders and have "followed" me. I'm getting choked tonite. Help.
@GrowlyGrego: Welcome to Pushovers Anonymous. Cool if we start with a reading? "fine by me!" "you bet!" "sounds good!" "NO" Sir, please leave. "NO" Okay.
@BucMarvin: Guinness Book of World Records should be in the Guinness Book of World Records as being the book with the most world records.