@juliussharpe: Dating is good practice for parenting because you learn not to care when someone is crying in a restaurant.
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@KellyMeldrum: I'm not usually vengeful, but when I am it's because someone gave my kid a whistle.
@tigersgoroooar: I bet there are at least a few seconds when a tiger is chasing you where you look back and are like, "awwww..."
@Quartzjixler: Speed dating (Don't say anything embarrassing) "So do you ever eat raisins and then later poop rehydrated grapes?" (DAMMIT!)