@EJGomez: dating tip #4: when meeting her brother for the 1st time make sure when he goes for the handshake u kiss him on the lips to assert dominance
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@Lisa_Laughs_: I don't talk about my ex's because I like to start of with a clean slate. That, and they're dead to me. Well, to everyone, but mostly me.
@Barknado69: [Marriage Counseling] Her: he always mixes two common sayings together that aren't relevant Me: well, blood is thicker than the early bird
@MaraWilson: How confused about the world are you right now, on a scale of 0 to "trying to figure out a friend's shower"
@Darlainky: "Sorry about this, but I ran out of allergy medicine and it's spring," I say to the frightened pharmacy clerk through my hazmat suit.