@FeelingMervis: DATING TIP: Girls like bad boys! Brag about your Twitter gang.
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@AndRyanTF: You ever watch a really stupid person for like 10 mins and wonder how they haven't been hit by a train or carried off by a giant eagle yet?
@KevinFarzad: The earth moves 1.6 million miles per day. So no I didn't just "lay in bed and watch TV all day" I traveled very far thank u
@david8hughes: *grandma sobbing at my graduation* "Your parents would have been so proud seeing you up there." *wipes tear* "But they didn't want to come."