@jwoodham: DATING TIP: Hold the door for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.
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@Tups13: Don't hesitate when you come to a fork in the road. Be bold. Pick that fork up and take it home. Free cutlery!
@thenatewolf: Telescopes probably use mirrors which means there is absolutely no way to know how many vampires there are in space.
@SkinnieTalls: The best thing about coming from a big family is being able to talk louder than normal people.
@LostCatDog: He's dead, Jim. Bought the farm. Bit the pita. Shanked the llama. He's a shit piñata. He's gone elf. Dropped the fudgsicle. No more potatoes