@Dawn_M_: Dating tip: Men always remember the woman who vomited on them.
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@1BigMick: If you believe the home alarm commercials, the first thing burglars do when they break into your home is smash your family pictures.
@wesleybordelon: Hey guys, what's the name of that movie where Michael Cera plays a socially awkward teenager?
@CVTBaby: It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. Then I'm back. Me, explaining a vacation to my cat.