@LoveNLunchmeat: Daughter has amputated three dolls in the span of twelve hours. Really hoping our dog is smart enough to stay away from her.
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@rickkondell: The plural of beer is beer, which is very convenient when you are explaining to your wife why you were late coming home from work.
@markleggett: Celebrities are so rich because they save money every time they attend a movie premiere for free.
@HollyHeals: Laughter is the best medicine........unless you have Morphine. Then Morphine is the best medicine.