@PaulGibson1963: Daughter steals my iPad so I left Google open on "too many kids" & "making it look accidental." Found my iPad but haven't seen her all day.
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@WildeThingy: In the UK we celebrate Thanksgiving as the day we managed to ship all our paranoid religious fundamentalists off to another continent.
@BrandonVine: *pulled over by cop* Cop: Did you know that your tags are expired? *tags cop* Me: You're it! Cop: Me running away: Renewed!