@KalvinMacleod: Day 3 of weight loss challenge: all my coworkers look like tacos. I do not understand how the meat remains in the shell as they walk around.
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@LindaInDisguise: The difference between your husband and your Netflix account is, over time, your Netflix account learns what you like.
@PaperWash: Noah build an ark "what? why" I'm gunna flood the earth "just give me fish powers" [jealous he didn't think of that] JUST DO WHAT I SAY!