@SteveKoehler22: Hey big accounts - What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ? My cat would be dead before I got 50

@_iTrevii: You gotta Snapchat, dm, and text your girl all @ the same time. That way if you piss her off in 1 convo, you still have two lives left.

@TheMichaelRock: Sarcasm is like hitting someone in the face with a bat, but with words.

@LuckyPetDeals: RT if you know someone like this!!!

@thatUPSdude: 50 Cent has filed for bankruptcy, he will now be known as 50. Story is he doesn't have a cent to his name. *drops the mic walks away*