@JohnLyonTweets: Dear 6-year-old me: As an adult you won't need to know cursive but you will need an ability to type with your thumbs. The future is weird.
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@thatdutchperson: "You're not pretty enough. Now pay us $3.99 so we can tell you why." - Magazines
@IamEveryDayPpl: Me: "I need big girl clothes." Him: "You haven't gained that much." Me: "I meant adult clothes for work." Him: "Does the couch pull out?"
@iwearaonesie: *sees cars lined up outside church* wife: Is that a funeral or a wedding? me: What's the difference?