@MrsGoose69: Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheCareBare: "Baby last night you were so hot, let's do it all over again this morning." -me, speaking to this leftover pizza.
@Thynebear: Did you seriously hire a mentally unstable person to drive our kids just so you could say he's driving them crazy? Me as a principal: Maybe
@DamonHunzeker: The best way to avoid awkward moments with homeless people is to ask them for money before they ask you.