@MrsGoose69: Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk.
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@TCsSideBitch: *standing outside your house I was totally going to stalk you but... *pets your dog instead
@AbbyHasIssues: I missed a call from my mom, so I assume the helicopter that just flew over my house is part of the search crew she called.
@DontTouchMyWine: Whoa. Wait a minute. So those stick figures on your car aren’t for pedestrians you ran over? Damn it! *starts scraping off her stickers*