@ag_loco: Dear Canadians,
Who's the cutest little nation?
Yes you are!
@TheCiscoKidder: I caught my son wiping his boogers on the couch which is gross because I don't want our boogers mixing.
@donni: "My god...we're monsters," I murmured to a local monster, who nodded sympathetically
@thepunningman: I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.
@Leslie_Annie: The older I get, the more I understand why Squidward is always so annoyed.
@SarcasticAlly12: My 5 yo after I explained the concept of breastfeeding: "can you squeeze Capri Suns outta those things or just milk?"