@Kid_topher: "Ride or die" seems a bit dramatic. I'm looking for a "ride or maybe go our separate ways if things aren't working out."

@fro_vo: Friend: your fly is open Me: yeah i know Fly: it's true i'll try just about anything

@neerjagurnani: "My eyes are up here" ~ The last words heard by any guy who checked Medusa out.

@PhuktUpScott: My neighbour was rushed to hospital today after a wasp landed on his face. It didn't sting him, luckily I got it first with my shovel.

@WorldStarFunny: Why these pigeons look like they bout to drop the most fire album of 2014