@StatusInBeirut: Dear media: There's nothing shocking about celebrities going topless, getting drunk, or falling over. nnLet me know when they read a book.
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@LurkAtHomeMom: The inventor of Gogurt has died. He would like you to open his urn along the dotted line and splatter half the ashes all over your shirt.
@KimDotcom: "The problem with quotes on the Internet is that they're not always accurate." - Albert Einstein
@MikeCanRant: There are shockingly few security guards at dog shows. You can run out and pet 4 or 5 dogs before they catch you. Last time I pet 8 of them.
@HatfieldAnne: Shouting “wahoo” instead of “woo-hoo” so everyone in this bar knows that I'm into fun AND sport fishing.