@reczit: Dear messed-up memory, please tell me where are my keys instead of reminding me that shit I did on May 08, 2002 at 09;13;54 PM.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@warhorse76: My mom used to make sure we were wearing our seatbelts in the back seat by slamming on the brakes. She was a kind soul.
@JediGigi: Mom: So, do you have someone special in your life? Me: Define "someone" Mom: You know, a boyfriend. Me: Define "boyfriend"
@MartaEffing: Her: I love your lip gloss. What brand is it? Me: *looks puzzled*licks lips* It's donut glaze.