@happily_dad: Dear neighbors, I am not killing my child. I'm washing her hair. Only she sees it the other way.
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@ManJuggs: If I ever go to prison, I'm gonna make damn sure everyone knows my street name: Butthole Teeth.
@shopkins776: I took two years of anger management courses Now I'm the manager of four brand new anger stores
@TheMichaelRock: Cinderella taught girls that it's ok if a guy has no idea what you look like as long as he's a prince.