@cdncyn: Dear parents with unattended children they will be given 4 red bulls and a kazoo
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@Jay_FrickinLynn: Me: We broke up. Male Friend: You okay? You need to talk? Shoulder to cry on? You want to come over? Go to dinner? Sleep with me finally?
@TheAlexP: Maybe raccoons aren't really digging through trash for food, Maybe they're just looking for something to remove their eye shadow.
@Quartzjixler: Thanks, meeting venue that turns off the AC in the restrooms--I love emerging from taking a dump looking like I just ran a marathon!
@heatherlou_: Google just alerted me to light traffic in my area which is odd because I'm in the bathtub.