@dance_blessed: decorating my apartment
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: The only time a man has ever asked me "do you have a sister?" was just to make sure he avoided dating her too.
@LostFelicia: Hey y'all, I finally got a smart phone. I'm a big girl now! Anyone got a 5 year old I can borrow to teach me how to use the damn thing?
@BeCoco77: He told me he was my daddy during sex. Then he acted all weirded out when I started crying and asked him to pay off my student loans.
@wendchymes: Apparently you can't just drop your ex off at the morgue just cause they are dead to you.