@jdbalani: Define Marriage: It's a way through which two people join together to solve the problems they never had before.
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@markleggett: Despite hating tomatoes, I was a tomato in a school play. I put my personal beliefs aside and nailed the role because I was a professional.
@Lazer_Cat_: Look grandma. You told me to bring something to the wake. If you meant a casserole, you should have said so. Now help me load this drum kit.
@praisecheese: This fall on Fox: X-Files Babies. Baby Skully and Baby Mulder meet at a petting zoo when they both get knocked over by the same goat.
@ShrinkMedia: My wife is amazing in bed. She can fall asleep immediately no matter how loud the TV is on.