@jasonmustian: "Did it hurt...when you fell from heaven and lost the use of your legs?"--bad pick-up line to use on a handicapped person
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@caperbc75: Hulk Hogan walks into a tanning salon and drops a saddle on the counter. "Make me look like this brother!"
@be_yourownhero: 10:00 am: sitting alone at work 10:05 am: my pudding cup is my new best friend 10:06 am: ate my best friend 10:07 am: sitting at work alone