@TheBoydP: Did you know that McDonald's once sold a burger named after the Hamburglar? It was discontinued however because the meat was too robbery.
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@thenatewolf: *I see a guy with a shark tooth necklace* ME: Holy shit, that's sharpest part of a shark. Who is this mysterious and brave hunk?
@tastefactory: DOCTOR: You've suffered a brain injury. It's affected your hippocampus ME:What? Lol sorry I was picturing hippos at college. Who are u again
@KeetPotato: [friends chatting in back of my car] "im good at impressions" how good? "watch" in satnav voice: "turn left" [i drive us clean off a bridge]