@Breadery: Dilemma: Your daughter brings home a guy with an Insane Clown Posse t-shirt on but your garden is already completely full of corpses.
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@ShanaRose21: I have a bad habit of starting things and never finishing them. Let's all be thankful I'm not a surgeon.
@bridger_w: When someone has a baby, I'm just like, OK, clearly you were desperate to have someone to hang out with
@DelanieFischer: One of my favorite things about Walmart: the impulse buy is no longer a breathmint, it's an entire rotisserie chicken.
@LoverOfComics94: Money doesn’t grow on trees. Your move, multinational agricultural biotechnology corporations.