@MsCassieDaniels: Disease doesn't care if you are a celebrity, Micheal J. Fox has battled Parkinson for 22 years, and Jamie Lee Curtis is super irregular!
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@notalogin: *Giant boulder slowly crushes several hundred cats* Guy who's about to invent the bagpipes: Hey, this gives me an idea!
@Sarcasticsapien: Me: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Me: When you fell from a really high distance. Dating as an atheist is hard.
@DamienFahey: Congratulations, Americans who write "Cheers" at the end of e-mails. You've found something even more pretentious than "Sent from my iPhone"
@Y_U_Hayden: Just clicked on an ad that said "Free Albums Here" But It linked to a download of a Nickelback album. Would have rather just gotten a virus.