@Donnie_Fairburn: DNA doesn't make you a parent. Stepping on a lego guy on your way to the bathroom at 3 am does
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@CornOnTheGoblin: [God wakes up] oh man i am hungover, what'd i do last night? [sees that goats have the ability to scream now] haha oh yea
@The_MartiniGirl: I love when people tell me to get my act together and I'm like who the hell is acting geez.
@CherBear162: An example of men's inability to understand women - Me: I have Nothing To Wear!! Him: Awesome!
@michaeljhudson: I brought a t-shirt cannon to a knife fight. Everyone dropped their knives to catch their own piece of WNBA history.