@TweetinChris: Do a little dance, make a little love, pay child support.
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@AudreyPorne: [2.13am] me: when cows die do they become cow ghosts? imagine being haunted by a cow ghost. him: *deletes my number*
@Fred_Delicious: Date - "I really dig intellectuals" Me - "oh yeah? well check this out babe" [counts to 17]
@JasonLastname: Show your neighbor they shouldn't park their boat outside of their house by filling it with two of every animal.