@NoogsCorner: Do I look like Christopher Columbus? Am I guiding a ship to a new land? So, when I ask for directions, please don't use words like "East."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@david8hughes: [1st day as lifeguard] Guy: there's someone drowning in the water Me [not looking up from phone]: well it'd be hard to drown in the sand
@donni: Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, though, it's every man for himself
@KrunkedRobot: Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
@Underchilde: Don’t worry if you’re not part of a clique. You can get the same experience by running through a minefield.