@KyleCrunk: Do not apologize for your dog coming up to me because this is exactly what I wanted
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@DONTJIMMYMEJULZ: When speaking to children I always end every sentence with "...or else you'll die. " - I find this to be an excellent motivational tool.
@andrewdrafts: If I say "Bloody Mary" three times in the mirror in the dark I get a free drink, right?
@iAmDelFreaky: Her: OMG! You didn't feed my cat while I was away? Me: Do you remember that time you didn't harvest my crops on FarmVille? Now we're even.