@weinerdog4life: Do not break eye contact with your waitress as you put the spaghetti in your wallet.
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@DaveWeasel: If you don't like the way you look naked, remember; by the time you have your clothes off, its the other person's problem.
@kellysdf: Apparently, if you Google "boss" and "chloroform" from your work computer, it sets off an alarm somewhere.
@Carter_TCB: Just found out men don't need prostate exams till at least 40. I think my doctor has a lot of explaining to do.
@therepoguy: I'm sorry this birthday cake suffered a severe accident where my hand fell into it and a chunk of it filled my mouth.