@Izianikapani: "Do people really become like their pets?" I wonder, absentmindedly raising a leg above my head and staring into space.
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@hammbone84: [On phone with Pizza Hut] Me: I texted my order 4 hrs ago! PH: Are you sure you didn't tweet it...again? Me: PH: Sir? Me: K. Love you. Bye.
@girlontapas: My mom bought me a bottle of whiskey as a Xmas gift... She seemed a little upset that I said she should've mailed it ahead of her visit.
@tweetsauce: This is ridiculous: "www" contains THREE TIMES more syllables than the phrase it is 'short' for, "world wide web."