@ch000ch: do the spectators at golf tournaments know they don't have to be there
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@EricBedner: "Bye, losers." *puts on motorcycle helmet and sunglasses* *rides unicycle into an elevator* "Can you push the button for the lobby please."
@thenatewolf: Tell me more about these male enhancement pills... Will they help me chop wood better? How about pelts? Will I know how to make pelts?
@MakesYouGiggle: Interviewer: Why did you apply for this job? Me: Because being broke and homeless didn't really call out to me.
@TheMichaelRock: [guy inventing Captain Crunch] Hear me out, they're razor blades, but they're delicious.