@rachelle_mandik: Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial muscles.
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@BuckyIsotope: Cookie Monster delivering the eulogy at Bert's funeral. Head bowed low. Stillness. "Me want cookies," he sadly intones. "Me want cookies."
@zachreinert03: finally sold everything that reminded me of my ex. kinda nice, I got $20 for her clothes, $50 for her tv, and $100 for our kid
@longwall26: That toddler on a leash at the mall might be an unstoppable killing machine. You really don't know.
@WilliamAder: Weather Girl: I'm looking at six to ten inches tonight. Me, to the TV: But is it going to SNOW?